BK and their colouring-in service provider should have just scanned the campaign brief into a *pdf and put the thing in Google docs and sent us all the link.
Creative Brief: BK Whopper
Background:
The Whopper burger is the blah blah selling burger in the blah blah markets in the top 5 region in the market in the region in the world. Why is the colonial outpost of New Zealand not conforming? There is no money in crapola cheeseburgers. Make them eat Whoppers. McDonalds are smoking us on cheapo Big Macs and the gourmet blah blah Burger Fuel something category shrinking. So we did some stuff in America and got some BookFace fans and it sounds like a big number so we're claming it.
Objective
Make the Whopper burger the number one selling burger in the blah blah colonial outpost across blah blah outlets by some time in the future.
KPIs
Harvest fans on social media by bribing them with free downloads like they did in the US to bolster numbers
Enter colouring-in service provider in converse one stars and ‘clever counter-pop culture even though I work for a global media mofo company’ t-shirt.
Commence Freudian word association.
Burger King. King. Prince William Visit.
End Freudian word association.
Present creative concept:
Present evidence of colonial New Zealanders being interested in Prince William at a BBQ with John Key PM. Prince William on America’s Cup boat etc etc. Photos, Youtubable things. ROYAL VISIT!
Season with tenuous Freudian word association (Burger King. King. Prince William Visit).
Crap on about ‘social media’ opportunities. Over mention Facebook and Twitter. Make funny ‘content is King’ pun hahahaahha. Overmention "America" --overseas stuff is always better.
Then..unleash the real fury…
MICROSITE* and TEASER CAMPAIGN**
(Genius)
*A MICROSITE is super important because it’s easy to bill
(don’t tell them that afore-overmentioned-crapped-on-about social media applications make a MICROSITE pretty much redundant.. do you want a new 4G iPhone or not? )
TEASER CAMPAIGN
(Extra Genius with cheese)
**A TEASER CAMPAIGN pretty much doesn’t work in the current fragmented media environment cos everyone doesn’t sit infront of the two TV channels at 6pm anymore. Coupled with the fact that GenY boiz (‘just put some 18” chromez on my Skyline bro”) demographic have the attention span of an ADHD goldfish. A minor detail. We can sell them more TVC production this way. Think of the 4G iPhone. It’s meant to have a better camera.
Some twaddle pop who survived the fury of corporate whipper snippering during the recession by snivelling and brown nosing then signs of on the brief (content is king! Hahahaha) and because all the ducks and are in a row, the square is being thought outside of, and someone is pushing an envelope.
Hooray! Roll out the brightly coloured media plan and the storyboards! Best of all the MICROSITE http://makewhopperno1.co.nz/index.php
What’s missing?
THE CUSTOMER
Why do I care that your Whopper burger is not number one?
I DON’T
What have you done to make me buy one of your burgers?
NOTHING
“I do not regard advertising as entertainment or an art form, but as a medium of information.” David Ogilvy
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